January 2012
i bought alcohol for a bunch of underage girls and they gave me cookies
December 2011
new years resolution:
abba
5 tags
A second David Foster Wallace just hit the World...
dingraha:
a new york ‘fire’ ‘fighter’ was killed by a flaming copy of ‘this is water’
i got so excited about something i bent a metal pipe
i’m a circus freak and you should feed me fish heads
“Giving and receiving, how many reflections these simple words have given rise...”
– Søren Kierkegaard, “Giving and Receiving” (via ouafouaf)
folding clothes at macy’s because it’s disgusting
I’m sexiled from my apt
i walked three miles to pass the time but it was raining
so I walked into the closest bar but it was a sports bar and i’m wearing eyeliner
The next bar looked shitty and good outside but was a grateful dead bar, I had no idea I was sitting in front of plush jerry garcia
I left without flushing but I tipped well
then I found the lucky labrador
...
My copy of gravity’s rainbow is growing mold but none of my other books
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“あ、
猫だ。
猫好き
猫大好き
猫が好き？
猫は紐が好き
猫は毛布が好き
猫はおかかが好き
猫はストーブが好き
猫はヨーグルトが好き...”
– そのとき猫は パンタ論 (via hetmek)
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today i checked a box to have google send me an email whenever a new mention of my name appears and the first thing they sent me was my obituary
“Love is my insides all messed up.”
– Ernest Hemingway (via beautyisanillusion)
hahahah i had this on the bookshelf next to me and remembered the quote and it’s even worse
“Not really. Not in the church. You wouldn’t marry me in the church and it broke my poor mother’s heart as you well know. I was so...
well if you invite bugs into your house you also invite the people who eat them
1 tag
1 tag
it’s getting taxing to keep going to the coffee place where everyone knows my name and talks to me and waves at me when i walk by
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i refuse to use anything but 100 watt
so my life is high contrast
my bathroom vanity burns out twice a month
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fuck i just left a really funny answer to an ask but accidentally sent it privately
asper your request i have removed all examples of subtle humor from my posting
i enjoy taking care of people and being loving and nurturing
but i’m probably thinking about strangling you with a cord during sex
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cool, i really like everyone posting right now
i’m walking to the store in this loose knit drapey sweater and everyone will see my nipples
again
there’s a single star in the Three Stars mansion constellation that represents excrement and four that represent a toilet
The Ghost mansion (Chinese: 鬼宿; pinyin: Guǐ Xiù) is one of the Twenty-eight mansions of the Chinese constellations. It is one of the southern mansions of the Vermilion Bird.
Asterisms
English name Chinese name Modern constellation
Ghost 鬼 Cancer
Cumulative Corpses 積尸 Cancer
Beacon Fire 爟 ...
that old turtle is cool but i just want to reblog pictures of (dreamy) TAMAHOME
3 tags
groans:
Your Ancestor’s FLYING DISC has been terribly delayed because of fear of Satellites and Devil Gene’s Radiation Attack in space. Everyone should be super alert! removing Devils & Crimes & Satellites from your daily life and business immediately with your Intelligence and Gain Good Gene (Longevity) from Sumerian God.
FLYING DISC spin and gyration to show the last...
i’m building the perfect skyrim gaming rig and donating it to a nerd for christmas
Anonymous asked: do you imagine anyone while you masturbate?
here at the irony club we think sincerity is for...
i’m using the new youtube snowflakes feature on videos of people in desert climates
Watch
for christmas i’m going to alienate everyone who likes me
when an animal makes its noise at people it is “talking”
let me show you how to make christmas fun
*reclines sofa back rest, pats newly formed sofa bed*
i’m shooting your front door with bullets but when i’m done it’s going to spell “time 2 kisss” and you’ll think it’s romantic
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destroyman replied to your post: last night i had the foresight to wake up and…
I fell asleep in math class and woke up to see I had written “trverse curve with inside on the left, father records results”
hahahahahaha
father will be pleased